Serving the Lord, New Treatment, God's Good!!!

Isaiah 41:10 "Fear thou not for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness."

Yesterday was another day for "starting" a new chemo. Our Pastor sent me this verse yesterday morning early, before I even went to the cancer center. As we were leaving to make our 15 min drive to the cancer center I was checking text and you know, God is watching out for you and having others to pray for you when one text was sent 4:30 am, another at 5 yet several others between 6 and 8 am. We, my husband an I had prayed Sunday night and again Monday morning that the Lord's will be done with this treatment, adding that everything running smoothly would be our preference. :)  Throughout the day I received various text from family, friends, and church family. God will never leave you or forsake. He gives us friends and family to love us and support us. 

To back up to earlier in the week, I haven't been able to go out soul-winning for some time, some health some weather. Gotta love Maine weather :) I was praying that the Lord would allow me to be able to go out soul-winning, then Thursday fell through for Ladies soul winning. Then I found out my husband wasn't working over time and we were going out on Saturday at our 12:30 soul winning time! The Lord answered my prayer in allowing me to be able to go out. Our Pastor gave us a visit we could make which turned into three in a way, one being via phone :) So then, when Monday came around I was nervous but knew I had done what the Lord would want during the previous week and the weekend. Staying faithful is key to anything you do, especially when it comes to serving the Lord. 

So on Monday after having a small glitch with my port, blood flow wasn't right at first, the rest of the day was looking pretty good. As I went into "my" chair for infusion, Cheryl, my nurse with a smile said, "I'll be watching you like a hawk." So, I was watched like you wouldn't believe! I had one of my sister in laws, my husband and a nurse right there the whole time! I also had my nurse call button in my hand the entire time letting go of it very little. I may have looked as though I was ready for a game or something *ha ha ha. The new chemo was started as she started the IV, tears began to roll, I will say even though I was thinking of the verse my Pastor had sent I was scared! There was thoughts of just two weeks before, I was so grateful for my sister in law and husband who quickly stepped up to my chair and we prayed. The peace that passeth understanding. As my husband prayed, such a peace and calmness came over me. I thank the Lord that he watches out for his own. Praise the Lord the treatment went very well.  

I'll now explain about the new chemo. I'm sure others could explain this better than I, but here goes: Abraxane - its a different form of paclitaxel than Taxol (chemical name Paclitaxel) In earlier studies it's shown Abraxane offers more benefits than a solvent-bases taxane when treating metastic breast cancer. 

When it comes down to which is better Abraxane or Taxol It does depend on your stage of cancer. The Taxol generally is the first choice for Breast Cancer, which is what I had given me two weeks ago.  When you have a reaction as I did, then other choices need to be made. As I said in my last blog post I almost died on Monday, January 8, 2018 because of the Taxol caring agent. Which puts me in a whole different realm of what treatments they can use for me. My doctors told me that the Abraxane is a cousin to Taxol with less harsh side affects as Taxol. I could still have a reaction but Praise the Lord I didn't! 

There are mild side affects, headaches, nausea, dizziness, hair loss etc.... Today, I've dealt with headaches all day. As I'm typing this I have a very mild headache but sitting in bed with lights low and working on this doesn't seem to be making it worse thankfully. 

As I face the next 11 weeks of chemo with 4 weeks including the treatments I get every three weeks for the next year, I believe God has a purpose and a plan for this all. My nurse yesterday as we talked and invited her to church and asked if she had ever accepted Christ into her heart. Was very sure of her salvation. She had been saved at Truth Baptist Church in Jefferson, ME, now Pastored by, Bro. Lovelace, years ago under a different Pastor. 

Friend, it doesn't matter what you are going through you can be a testimony for Christ! I'm naturally shy (some who read this may laugh if you know me well) but really I am naturally shy. It doesn't come easy for me to witness to people. I can sit in front of my computer and type and witness to people all day, because I'm not coming face to face with them. Put me out in the world, going door to door, if I don't know you I'm not as apt to talk, but with prayer and Lord's leading I and you can witness to anyone. 

The fear of having cancer, the fear of a third chemo going into my body, the fear of talking to someone about Christ, God can and will help you through each and every step. Fear isn't of God, so depend on God, trust in Him and His word to get you through each step of life. It doesn't matter if that next step is going for new job. God can and will give you the strength, wisdom and help needed to get there. God's grace is sufficient for YOU and for ME!!! 

Isaiah 41:10, "Fear thou not for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness."

Sitting at the Cancer Center

Yesterday was a very emotional and stressful day as I went to the Alfond Center for Cancer. As I sat there waiting for my name to be called for blood draw and meeting the with Dr. Julia, I noticed several things......

1. A lady who just learned she was to face surgery. Her loving husband trying to comfort her and assure her she would be OK.
2. A man who has to come in two or three times a week and is as happy as can be. He still skies White Tail Mountain. We spoke with him and how sad, he doesn't have time for church like things.
3. An elderly lady all alone, no one with her, she sat over in a corner with her eyes closed. Several tried to talk with her, volunteers, myself but she said, no.
4. Then myself who was a nervous wreck, didn't want to be there due to the week before, but I have the Lord and  my husband was right there by my side. Tears were escaping on an off while sitting there.

When you are out and see people what do you see? Just another person? Or one who could use an encouraging word? Maybe one who needs a helping hand? A soul who needs Christ? Yesterday I was very concerned, scared, not wanting to be where I was. However, I remember sermons, of put yourself last, think about others and what they need. Sunday evening, I had to be home and so via the Internet I listened to our church service. Our Pastor spoke on We're Our Own Worst Enemy. You know he's so right!!! How many times could I have told someone of Christ but didn't. How many times have I put ME first?

So even though I was not wanting to reenter the Alfond Center yesterday I decided to try looking at others try to see them as not just another patient but as one who is hurting as I am or worse. We/I wasn't able to speak to the first lady I mentioned because there was several around her. Even though I don't know her name I am praying for her. Praying for others brings a whole new perspective on your life. The gentleman my husband spoke mostly with, and the elderly Lady I tried to speak with, we tried to talk with them but they wouldn't listen. I can still pray that in some way, what was said, he'll remember and receive Christ.

After talking with my amazing oncologist, Dr. Julia M. she as only a caring doctor can do assured me that nothing will be done that I don't agree to. Also that the chemo I had gone into anaphylactic shock with would NEVER be used again. The Lord gave me the opportunity to witness to the nurse who was doing my blood work, one that was on stand by in case she was needed. Then nurse Susan, with tears in her eyes yesterday, gave me a huge hug saying she was so happy to see me. She couldn't stay and talk but took a track. Then the Psychologist, they felt I needed to see was such a sweet lady, my husband tried to give her a track but she simply replied that is nice, but no thank you. I'm sharing my day from yesterday because, No matter who you are, no matter where you go. Don't I ask, Don't be your own worse enemy. Don't neglect others! Don't say, Oh someone else will talk to that person! We never know what a day may hold. We never know when we will loose a loved one. We never know when one will have anaphylactic shock because of a medication, bee sting or anything!!!!

The picture I'm sharing is one I wasn't going to. God protected me and allowed me to pull through this.

January 2nd is about what I usually look like, the day before I was going in for my chemo was that Sunday January 7th. Then the the other 2 pictures the one being after they stabilized me and then the day after. God chose to let me pull this, and I'm forever Grateful for his protection and for the support of many, my husband being the my biggest supporter that was right with me.

So, If you my friend are reading this and don't know for sure your going to heaven I'd like to show you how you can know.
Romans 3:23 "For all have sinned and come short of the glory of God."
We're all sinners, and without Christ we can't go to heaven.
Romans 6:23 "For the wages of sin is death...."
There's a payment for what we do. God has already paid for your sins! You don't need to pay for them. Why?
Romans 5:8 "But God commendeth his love toward us in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us."
Right here it tells us, Christ died for you and me! He did this so we wouldn't have to pay for our own sins.
Romans 6:23 "...but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord."
Romans 10:13 "For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved."
Salvation is a FREE gift! Anyone, you, me, your friend, a parent anyone can call upon the name of the Lord and he WILL nor might, not possibly, but WILL BE SAVED.
You simply call upon him by Faith.

If you will ask the Lord to save you. (Realize it's not the words that will save you, but your faith in Jesus Christ)

"Dear Jesus, I know I am a sinner. Please forgive me of my sins. I now trust you as my personal Saviour. Come into my heart and save my soul from Hell. Please take me to Heaven when I die. Thank you for saving me, Jesus. Amen"

If you have read this and through Faith accepted Christ pleases leave me a comment that you trusted Christ so that I can rejoice with you.

Make Today Amazing by Trusting in Christ.

Do you know where you'll spend eternity?

Good evening, this post isn't going to be an easy one for me to write. See, this past Monday wasn't exactly the day we, my husband an I, had planned. I was scheduled to start my chemo on Monday, we went in had the usual blood draw, saw my doctor and I went to my infusion chair. All was going well, until somewhere around two pm.

From here to about nine pm I'm missing bits an pieces of my day. Before I go into this part of Monday, January 8, may I ask you, "If you were to die today where would you spend eternity?" Friend, Monday, I almost met my Saviour!  This is no joke, I'm not making this up. At 1 pm I was given benadryl and another med to help in case of an allergic reaction to Taxol the chemo medication I had not had before. Around 2 pm the Taxol at a slow and very low dosage was started through my port/IV. Now from here on I remember very little of the day because I went into anaphylactic shock. If you don't know what this means I was dieing. Thank the Lord though my doctors and many nurses were, as my husband says, "on their A game", that day. God guided them and used them to save my life!

See I went into my appointment with no real concern, I was actually confident that all was going to be good. Before I went into the infusion area I had handed out several tracks and I was hoping to possibly lead someone to the Lord that day. My day changed in a matter of minutes. We never know what a minute may hold.

My infusion for Taxol had started, knowing I could possible have a reaction, I had prayed that the Lord would protect me and all would go well. The next thing I remember I couldn't breath and I didn't feel right. I couldn't speak loud enough to get anyone's attention either. However, my husband noticed and took action immediately.  There are bits an pieces I remember but I'll not go into. Later of which I don't know time wise I was in the ER. Where more doctors and nurses were helping me.

Even though, I know For sure where I'm going I would hate for someone to be where I was on Monday, an not know the Lord.

John 3:16 one of my favorite verses. "For God so loved the world that He gave his only begotten son that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. "  See God loves you and me so much, He gave his son for us! Jesus died on the cross, was buried and raised again, so you an I could have everlasting life!  We don't have to pay for our own sins. By faith believe in the Lord. He will, not might, or maybe, HE WILL SAVE YOU!

Friend, whoever you are, wherever you live, whatever you are going through, Don't do it without God! There's a reason I didn't die Monday. I don't know what God has for me but I'm grateful not only for my family and friends that I'm still here, but that God apparently has something for me to do.

This evening I text my Pastor about a nurse I remembered being called "Z". I remember talking to her but couldn't remember all I had said. Thankfully, I had talked to her and invited her to church. Although i didn't see anyone saved I put forth an effort to tell others of Christ.

Monday is basically a blurr but I pray in some way, some how God allowed me to touch someone's life for Him.

As to how I'm doing, I'm home recovering. I will go Monday January 15 to see my oncologist and figure out what is next. God is Only Always good and with him I, we will get through this journey of Cancer!

On Purposefully Look for Blessings

Good morning everyone! We're having a heat wave today it's 12° out!  🤗  After close to a week of sub zero temps at night an not much warmer during the day it feels as though we're in a heatwave. Thought I'd share a few special pics for you to enjoy!

 Pa, Grammy and Audrey

 Grammy and Jacqueline

Blizzard 2018

So what are you thankful for? What blessing have you received lately? If we're not careful we'll forget to be thankful or look for those blessings. We get so busy, or so wound up in our own lives that we miss out on blessings or being a blessing. So I decided for the next 12 weeks, 84 days I'm going to do something. I would like to challenge you to also do this, we'll not the chemo part 🤣

Starting today for the next 12 weeks I have chemo. Yesterday, I decided to daily, on purpose be thankful or be a blessing to someone. When I find or see a blessing, or something I'm thankful for; then I'll look up a scripture verse to go along with it. I'll record it in a notebook each day then when I'm down or feeling sorry for myself I can look back on what God did for me or another.

Today's already proven to have blessings by the many text I've received of people praying. So today is going to be amazing through thankfulness. 🤗😍

Caleb proposed to Elizabeth on 12/24/17 😍🤗

Looking Forward

As we come into 2018 we need to think of all the fun things, all of what God can do, how God can use us and so much more. Don't dwell on the bad or what could happen.

As I say this I'm facing over 50 doctor appointments from January 8 to Dec 31st. I could let this ruin my time with my family as well as the year BUT I have a lot of exciting things to look forward to. 
1. Caleb an Elizabeth's wedding.
2. Visiting with my grandbabies.
3. Going to Church being a part of the ministry.

These are just a few things I can look forward to.
I know that what I'm facing isn't going to be easy and it's not going to be fun, but with God all things are possible.  When I started the clinical trial they told me I would lose my hair. I believe in the power of prayer! I also believe because of my praying God allowed me to keep my hair. Again, I've been told you'll lose you're hair during this 12 weeks of Chemo. If I do I'll be sad it won't be easy, but I'll be praying for God to allow me not to. Sort of odd but I can look forward to changing my hair style or color. LOL

Looking forward to 2018 for most is easy, but I'll have to work on it at times. Trust in the Lord with all thine heart.... it won't always be easy but I'm trusting in God to help me Look Forward to special times and to get through the hard times.

So as you start the new year, take one day at a time, praise God for that day and make it Amazing, by looking forward to your day, month, year!!

It's Ok to say, "No, I can't do that"

Good afternoon to all my amazing friends, family, prayer warriors and countless others. I have no idea who all reads this blog or who is praying for us during my journey. I do know that without a doubt the Lord is taking care of us through it all.

This week will start the Year long journey that I/we as  a family are facing. During all the treatments, chemo and radiation we have a graduation to plan for, Jason has business math to finish, I have piano lessons, my wonderful husband has appointments to go to with me, some of his own appointments plus so much more. However we'll simply take the next 365 days one day at a time. Trusting in the Lord each step of the way!

For those who want to know my appointment tomorrow is at 9:30 then on Wednesday my day will start at 8:30 in the morning with Blood draw then approximately around 10 I'll start the infusion which will go for six hours. This will be my last treatment for 2017.

So that is the very short of a very long list of appointments, of  which  I was told about on Thursday. This past Thursday we had several things that were planned but by mid morning I had to say, "No, I'm unable to do that today." Not because I decided just not to do those things, but I needed time to process. If you are going through ANYTHING you need to be able to say, "No" sometimes. You may say, "but you've been going through these things for eight months what more is there to process?" Well, when I was told I had this other appointments I didn't know the extent of it all, and when my doctor called on Thursday it was a bit overwhelming. As I was told that afternoon, it's ok to say, No. I was also told, "you don't need to just push through and pretend everything is normal. Sometimes you need to take time out and process." I'm so thankful for that and the understanding of our (Interim) Pastor and his wife. Even though we had a big yearly event planned, they understood and I didn't have to worry about that evening.

It took me a lot of that afternoon, and evening to really process not only the upcoming appointments of the next year but other things.

So as you go through you daily lives, as you face different things in your life realize that sometimes you just need to say, OK, it's not a normal day, I need this time to process or I need to NOT do this or that. We all, myself included, have days where seeing people, talking with someone specific, or seeing certain people is hard it's ok. Once you realize that just because one isn't here or there doesn't mean necessarily mean they are sick, or don't want to see you, it very simply could be they are having to process things in their life.

So as you go through your day, Make it amazing, Make someone's day amazing. If they say, No don't take it personally but rather say ok an go on.
 

The Journey continues

Hello from cold, snowy Maine! It's definitely beginning to look like Christmas around here. I'm sure many if not all of you have your tree up and your house is decorated for the Christmas season. This is one of my favorite holidays. This year seems to have a little extra specialness to it. Jesus gives us all life and he is leading his children through life. Yes there are trials and journeys we each must face, will face or are facing. One journey I think of is the one that I know many are facing this Christmas season and that is having loss a loved one. These dear friends and family are especially in my thoughts as we go through this Christmas. Then there are those going through the journey of illness, pain, heartbreak etc. These dear people also are in my thoughts and as much as I would rather not be a part of this group I am. However, as I told a dear friend earlier today, back in May I told the Lord no matter what the results I would give him the glory. So rather than looking at this as poor me, it's been what can God do through me that will bring glory to him.

I'm not sure if I have shared the following already so if I have please bear with me. Back in oh, January of this year maybe a little later in the year I had told the Lord I wanted to serve him more. In April my Pastor had asked me if I would help in an area, and I was thrilled to do that, I had started piano lessons again to improve my playing and learn more about music, I had also made decisions about Bible reading, Prayer, soul winning and many other things. Then as you know in May I was diagnosed with HER2+ ICD. At first I asked why? I;m going to serve you Lord, I have made steps in the direction of increasing areas, getting back to things I knew I needed to do, not just for me but for the Lord. Anyway, after the initial shock of everything and much love, support, and caring from several dear friends, my church, my Pastor, I knew I couldn't let this stop me. So I told the Lord no matter what you'll get the glory for everything.

Well, the Clinical Trial I did that was in Boston did what the doctors had hoped it would. I know it was of the Lord that it went as it did. Once I heard that I was cancer free, I was Praising the Lord and so excited, hoping and praying that I wouldn't have a lot more to go through. Well, if you are on Facebook you have seen some of what I will be facing for the next 12 months.

For an entire year I'll be having treatment every 3 weeks, this will continue to attack anything that possibly could be left from the cancer. The purpose for this is the HER2+ is a very aggressive cancer. If I was to say no to this treatment I would run a higher risk of it reoccurring. Then I'll have a total of 8 weeks of Chemo, which I'm very thankful I won't be getting the AC Chemo which is a harsh chemo. I'm able to go without that. However this will mean I'll have a greater chance of hair loss now. I am at peace with this, if I lose my hair, as of now I can say, "I'm prepared for it" now when it actually happens if it does.... well, I'll let you know then how I do. Lastly will be shortly after chemo is finished I'll have 6 weeks of Radiation.

For those who are asking why are you going through this if you are cancer free? The key reason is preventative! See, the chances of the cancer returning right now are greater than if I go through the year of treatments, chemo and radiation. Once I complete the year of everything my chance of it reoccurring is less than 10%.

Will I be sick during all this? Probably, but as Dr. Julia said, "everyone is different."
Hair loss, again I didn't loss it earlier which they are very surprised by. I believe it was a HUGE answer to prayer! I prayed and prayed that the Lord would allow me to keep my hair, and well, he did! "Ask and it shall be given you" The Bible clearly states that the Lord gives us the desires of our hearts and that's exactly what I believe he did.
Will I have stop any part of it because my body can't handle it? We'll have to see. However, again my prayer is that since the Doctors believe this is what I need that the Lord will allow me to go through everything with as little problems as possible. Just as I did the first round, I'll stay busy, I'll stay positive and trust in the Lord to take care of everything.
I have an in home nurse now so that if I have a problem or need her, all it takes is a phone call. Plus my oncologist is only 15 minutes away during the day. So with all the medicines, chemo, radiation that will take place I have medical staff close by. I have my church family who, by the way has been, next to my family, the biggest and greatest support anyone could ask for.

So my dear friends, though all this sounds terrible, trust me when I say, "I'm at peace with everything, God has and will get all the glory for everything." He won't get the glory only if it's good, though hard he will also get the glory for the bad/hard as well.

C - Concern not only for your family but others.
A - Abide in Him don't quit on God
N - Never give up, we weren't given life to just give up.
C - Caring for others, though you are hurting or sick put others first and show them you care.
E - Enduring all that is before you even on those days you don't feel up to it.
R - Rejoice in the Lord even when you don't feel like it.

Even with a word that is so awful, dreadful and fearful we can take and turn it around to be our platform, our encourager, our help to others.

So what will you do to Make Today Amazing! Or as a gift I received the other day, says, "Make Today Ridiculously Amazing!" Go out and share a your testimony or a testimony of one you know that would help another.